Comedy writer, stand-up and storyteller in NYC | Political wonk | UCB Student | Chosen for the NBC Late Night Writers Workshop | https://t.co/1xiyEtyIzm
New York, NY
1.854 Tweets 26.242 Followers 15.091 Followings 6.540 Likes
Login to Follow Direct Message Mute Block
It's kind of like that time his foot hurt so he wouldn't have to attend the Vietnam War. #WHCD…
20 hours, 9 minutes ago
Twitter Web Client
507 Retweets 999 Likes
.@realDonaldTrump If you get bored at the WH wandering around in your bathrobe, we'll all be watching @FullFrontalSamB that night.
20 hours, 28 minutes ago
139 Retweets 1386 Likes
.@realDonaldTrump The good news is that if Trump wants to avoid places he's being made fun of, he'll never be able to go anywhere again.
20 hours, 32 minutes ago
937 Retweets 4746 Likes
.@realDonaldTrump Thank God. Last time you attended, it led to the worst mistake of this generation - you running for office.
20 hours, 35 minutes ago
405 Retweets 3836 Likes
.@realDonaldTrump Obama inherited a recession caused by corrupt bankers.
You added the corrupt bankers to your cabinet.
1 days, 5 hours ago
Twitter for Android
457 Retweets 1764 Likes
Point taken, though any dictatorship starts with baby steps.
Also, the replies to this tweet will make you laugh u…
6 Retweets 35 Likes
@Nafta78 Hey, I didn't say it first. Sean Spicer did.
1 days, 6 hours ago
0 Retweets 0 Likes
Sean Spicer, regarding #FreedomOfThePress: "That's what makes a democracy a democracy versus a dictatorship."
1 days, 21 hours ago
464 Retweets 526 Likes
Wayne LaPierre Plot Twist:
People who own guns to protect us against a tyrannical government end up supporting the tyrannical government.
1 days, 23 hours ago
666 Retweets 985 Likes
Trump writing his speech for #CPAC2017.
2 days, 1 hours ago
18 Retweets 65 Likes
Trump: Anonymous sources should "say it to my face."
He's now being investigated for threatening cruel and unusual punishment.
2 days, 2 hours ago
19 Retweets 52 Likes
The US is home to 5% of the world’s population, but 25% of its prisoners.
Their actions this week prove they want that number higher. #CPAC
18 Retweets 21 Likes
#3 No coincidence that also yesterday, Sessions issued a memo rolling back Obama's rule from last year phasing out private prisons.
14 Retweets 28 Likes
#2 Yesterday, Spicer hints at "greater enforcement" of federal marijuana laws, despite 71% of voters believing it should be up to states.
19 Retweets 33 Likes
#1 "We will support the men and women of law enforcement." Stricter enforcement, stop and frisk...
10 Retweets 19 Likes
Trump doubling down on Chicago now. Pay attention here. It's a 3-step process of disenfranchisement: #CPAC
57 Retweets 86 Likes
There's a word for those in the FBI who choose their country and the truth over the insistence of the President:
2 days, 4 hours ago
167 Retweets 471 Likes
Orrin Hatch posts a "town hall," but it's only a talk at a company.
In the middle of their workday.
2 days, 14 hours ago
144 Retweets 199 Likes
.@realDonaldTrump Where are your angry tweets about the "Winter White House?"
2 days, 18 hours ago
398 Retweets 1502 Likes
.@realDonaldTrump Obama tried, but these lives aren't as important to Republicans as the NRA's money.
136 Retweets 1100 Likes